sharp shootin'

i hardly even know what just happened in my life over the past two days. but i am going to try & explain it to you. be warned.

yesterday morning i left church with scott, tim, and derek. we had an xsm staff overnight retreat to plan for the upcoming year. your first hint about the character of the weekend--none of us knew where scott was taking us for this retreat. we headed out of lexington, and after backtracking through smalltown, kentucky, usa we ended up at this place called canoe creek lodge (or some such name). even though we were literally in the middle of nowhere, it looked nice. and then we walked in the door. friends, there were enough stuffed animals in that room to send the children of 5 taxidermists to college. now certainly there are people in north carolina who hunt... i do not know any of them. most people from chapel hill/unc upon walking into that room would've reacted in a similar manner that i did (at one point i curled up in the fetal position on a couch...only somewhat jokingly) or far worse--running in the opposite direction might have been appropriate.

fortunately, the place we were staying for the night was across the property & was virtually dead-animal free. we settled in there, then came back to the main lodge. while our hostess prepared lunch, we took a golf-cart tour of the clay pigeon course. i had a lot of fun driving, until i nearly killed my boss & i driving down this death-drop of a gravel hill (rachel--several times over the course of this weekend, i experienced similar feelings to yours in denali. less justified feelings, perhaps, but the same ones, nonetheless). and as if driving a golf-cart for the first time was not enough, after lunch we shot guns. real ones, with bullets. (well, that's one check off the ole bucket list that i don't recall even writing down) i sort-of-kind-of hit the target, and it was actually a bit exhilarating, but i have no desire to partake again. this is what i get for being one female working with 3 guys all year.

after that we did a lot of work, which was really good. for dinner we decided to drive way back down the road towards lexington to a new shopping center with a movie theater so we could see the dark knight. we ate at a japanese steakhouse beforehand, which brought about the third first of the day--eating whole bites of sushi rolls...and liking it! ugh, but i haven't ate as much as i ate last night in a long while. another symptom of being around guys perhaps? the movie afterwards ended up being really good--not something that would normally be on the top of my list, but with all the hype i definitely wanted to check it out. christian bale is hot, heath ledger was astounding--that got me through (haha, just kidding). it was very disturbing (which means it was done well) and had an all-star cast. really long though, but good. of course on the way up the long, creepy, deserted driveway back to the house later that night, scott thought it would be funny to stop the car halfway up and cut off all the lights. no, not scary at all in deliverance-ville, KY. nor did it help that the doors of the house where we were staying had been unlocked all night because the lady didn't give us a key.

still yet, i slept long & hard after all the day's excitement. only minimal nightmares. waking up in the morning, eating breakfast outside, and taking some time to talk with God in the middle of an amazing natural setting was really good. i read in Micah 7 and Colossians--such beautiful words about the supremacy of Christ (the "all things" hymn). all things have been created through Him and for Him. He is before all things and in Him all things hold together. Likewise the words in chapter 3: "as God's chosen people, holy and dearly loved, clothe yourselves with..." these good things. Over all these put on love and let the peace of Christ rule in your hearts! What truth & beauty!

while talking to God, i was thinking about the relient k song, "i'm a little more than useless." and i heard God answer, "and that is enough." He is awesome for loving me. for loving us.

our morning meeting was a marathon of calendar planning. we've got it all laid out--which makes it seem like the year is going to fly by, and i'm sure it will! that planning portion took longer than expected, so instead of venturing out for a lunch break, it was decided (pretty much by the male consensus) to just "snack on" the foods we had. which was trail mix, chips, popcorn, and cookies. yea, i still feel nauseous. that is not lunch. next time i think i'll fast.

but we got a lot of awesome stuff done on this retreat & i'm very excited about the upcoming year! now it is my prayer that these things will be actualized, with our combined efforts, with help from willing leaders, and with the input and direction of the students.

my own personal goal is to make sure (as likewise the ministry--and every ministry--seeks to do) Christ stays at the center for me & in the work that I do. it must be so easy for Jesus to slip out of all these activities and events and plans and gatherings. if He does, then none of it matters. it's a careful balance to maintain. you can't just beat someone (especially a teenager) over the head with a Bible and expect them to keep coming back for more. my challenge will be to find my own balance as a minister of fellowship/fun and of spiritual growth.